Do they benefit from your response to their hurtful behavior?
Love and Abuse - Een podcast door Paul Colaianni

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Some hurtful behavior can have a secondary benefit to the person hurting you. Some behaviors can cause you to react in such a way that brings the hurtful person benefit. Because of that, they know how to get their needs simply by acting badly. If you want to know why you can never please someone, this episode might help you answer that question.